First, we weren’t non-monogamous in any way. Not too many years from it and the fantasies of group sex were there in our lives just not a realization yet. Polyamory wasn’t even a thought or an awareness of its existence. Pretty vanilla in most ways.

We were still rather active in organized religion though the organized part had begun to pale for us. But we were a mainstream, mostly normal couple at this time.

Still 2 years away from being grandparents at an early age. Started the hormonal thing with the boys pretty heavy with the oldest son.

Very busy with extra curricular activities for them. On the go constantly.

No health issues due to age. Eyesight was still about the same as my young years (nearsighted). We took that for granted. The being in fairly good health and able to get up and go with out making bone cracking noises.

It was a good time for our marriage. We had gotten past the general problems of the earlier years. We were starting on the ones that all the work had made possible. Though we communicated rather well, it wasn’t what we would later be able to do. (Even now, I find that we don’t discuss things as much as we were while in multiple relationships. When something isn’t absolutely necessary you let it slide.)

We were on the cusp is seems of some life changing decisions. Little did we know.

We think that we are always going to have a tomorrow. A tomorrow to be with someone, a tomorrow to get something done, a tomorrow to tell someone something, or just a tomorrow period.

Since I seem to be wallowing in the sameness of life, same drama, same relationships and all and I’ve been a bit stressed at work so I’m not thinking well to gather my own thoughts….and I happen to like some of these….I’m adding these to my blog to get my brain going again at the least.

Time.

Good quality time with those I love. Particularly of the romantic kind. Currently, I’m only in one relationship but, I know from experience that quality time (and sometimes quantity) is not easy to come by with any relationship. I truly enjoy spending time with those I love.

There is nothing like the release of laughter. It’s the best medicine for ails you in my opinion.

However, Dirk and I have offered for her to move here and live with us. Her and her dog. That’s a big step. I love my mother but she does “rub” at my nerves even on visits so living in the same house would most likely exasperate that somewhat.

Truthfully, I doubt she takes us up on the offer. Which will disappoint me in her reasons why she didn’t. I have a sister she used to live with but she moved across country. Mom was asked to go with them and refused. I feel it would have been good for her. She has been living with a sister that really doesn’t have the room for her and mom doesn’t have much privacy at all.

I think, ideally, it would work if mom rotated between the four of her children. Well, that’s ideally in the situation she is currently in. The actual idea would be for her to have her own place. But that isn’t possible at this time.

I want my mom to be happy, to feel she belongs somewhere.

However, it’s the start of a new year that has new possibilities so I will celebrate that.

It was favorite one for Dirk and I. Not much stress over who to spend the time with. When it turned out our youngest and his GF could travel with us then that was the end of that.

Of course there was some stress over making sure I spent some time with each of the boys and my mom and sister. It worked out but I am tired.

Tired mostly I guess because the drive back was long and late. Getting behind wrecks on the interstate causes that. But I couldn’t get upset because I was thankful it wasn’t us involved.

I couldn’t rest on the trip back as I planned because I was requested to bring a puppy back for the sister who lives her. Good pup but still time consuming.  She was happy. Even though doing so meant I didn’t have room left to bring her gifts back and she’ll have to wait on them to be mailed.

I’m really up in arms about my oldest. He is so homesick right now. He is missing us badly. He hated to see us go. I miss him too. But I truly think he needed the time with family more than the rest of us. I was happy to have had to opportunity to give it to him.

He’s met a girl and spent some time with her around us and her family. I hope he takes it slowly. She appears the type that would do that but I’ve been fooled in the past.

Then there’s not quite a family gathering unless someone pisses you off in some way. It wasn’t my stepfather. It was my BIL. Long story but it ended in him invading my son’s privacy on his computer and we had some words. Not a lot and not bad. We did well in getting our feelings across without a blown out deal. But it added to the true holiday package didn’t it?

Oh and no snow but colder weather was nice. Too much food and homemade candy though.

P.S. Nothing was mentioned about our alternative lifestyle. That may have helped with some things.

Don’t want you to think I forgot about you though.

Work, with the accident, my work is behind. And this is one of the worst possible times for that. I need to be here more hours and not less but things still are not as stable with hubby as they need to be. I’m thankful to have a job but really need to be away from it for a little longer. Doing things piecemeal as I did last week may have cost me a mistake that I will end up paying financially down the road. It is what it is. And it isn’t the end of the world.

Hubby, he isn’t as better as he had hoped to be and will not be back at work today like his job wanted. If I hear one more person tell me he should burn the motorcycle I will scream. He is doing much better but now you have to add in the psychological frustrations of not healing fast, the getting tired of not being able to do as normal period and the having the ask for help.

One child is in the process of making a major purchase and he constantly calls checking in. He’s trying to do the right thing and knows that it’s his decision but with things as they are with us, he worries about things too. He’s moved closer to home and is job hunting.

The other child is job hunting as well and really would like to move back home too. Just trying to weigh the pros and cons of that.

Trying to get it all done is getting to be overwhelming for me. So, I had to get some of it out by whining a bit here.

Hubby had a motorcycle wreck but is healing up fine. I won’t go into details for autonomy’s sake but things could have been much worse. He kept his head. So, lucky he is going to be ok.  So, is the bike (he was worried).

But what I’m also blessed  in is my husband. I’m tired. He’s able to take care of himself mostly now but with doing all I had to for him in the beginning, trying to work some because so much of what I do is in my head and stuff like that, and then doing it all at the house, I’m even more aware of how much he contributes to that household in terms of work.

We don’t particularly have his and her chores. A few because we each do have our strong suits and some are obviously done better by one than the other.

He does so much. I listened this morning to one woman complain about working all day and coming home to having to cook by herself at night. So many women have to do that. I don’t. I can’t really think of anything he doesn’t help with other than checkbooks and such.

He’s great. I know this. And I do try not to take it for granted at any time. But, him being out of commission just makes me really take stock.