Loving More Than One

Polyamory as it relates to my life and written from my perspective only. MY thoughts, feelings and opinions.

Ever Wonder

on February 10, 2011

If you’ve been lied to or sneaked around on, do you ever wonder just how long that has been going on? Or how long it would have continued if you hadn’t discovered the truth? And do you wonder just why it was imagined you wouldn’t discover the truth?

I do. I wonder all of that. And I wonder why someone would do things like this. And if they realize that one day they will be discovered, was doing it worth what they got out of it?

I wonder why respect and trust and integrity are not important to many people.

I mean the “golden rule” is basically the same no matter what religion you subscribe to. Treat others as you would like to be treated.


2 responses to “Ever Wonder

  1. Yes, yes, and yes to your first three questions. Then it is usually followed by the thought; “They know having other partners is fine and the one rule I insist upon, that will end our relationship if broken, is honesty so why in the hell did they do that?!?!”
    But before I grab a frying pan and chase them into a corner to demand an answer I try to remember a few things. Most people are raised monogamously and inherent in their psychology (subconsciously or not) is the behavior pattern that says; If I have another lover they should be hidden. I shouldn’t tell my original partner about my new love. Never should the two be allowed to meet and if they are, only under controlled circumstances ensuring they won’t talk and find out I’m sleeping with them both. I will be sneaky and smart and never get caught and the world will continue to spin as normal.
    Then I get the frying pan and corner them. If somehow they can come up with a good reason (doubtful) for their actions I might not smack them. If they sound like they don’t know any better or it is social condition like I mentioned above, I’ll probably smack them anyway with the hopes of driving stupid thoughts from their head. So far it hasn’t worked 😦


    • Yeah, that frying pan just isn’t as effective as it should be is it?

      And I understand what you are saying about this mentality. But when monogamous I wouldn’t have cheated. I feel you make a commitment for certain behavior and you should abide by it. If I couldn’t do that any longer, well then it’s time for a talk.

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