Loving More Than One

Polyamory as it relates to my life and written from my perspective only. MY thoughts, feelings and opinions.

Communicaton: Receiving Messages

on February 21, 2011


The key to receiving messages effectively is listening. It’s more than hearing words—-you need to want to understand the person speaking. You need to have an attitude of respect and a willingness to open your mind to another’s point of view.

Listening isn’t easy. It takes concentration. It means we have to set aside our own thoughts—our own agendas. We need to try and see things through another’s eyes.

When we listen effectively we get a better understanding of where the other is coming from. What is behind their perspective came from. Even if we don’t agree with their POV, understanding it gives us insight into others.

Give full attention to the speaker. Doing so tells the speaker “What you are saying is important”. We can do this by leaning gently towards the speaker, facing the speaker squarely, open posture (with arms and legs uncrossed), head nodding when appropriate and facial expressions.

Be aware of the speaker’s nonverbal messages by pay attention to body language and listening to tone and pitch in speech.

Practice reflective listening. Which is the process of restating, in your own words, what you believe are the feelings and content being stated to you. This makes the speaker feel they are being heard and acknowledged. It also gives the speaker a chance to give feedback on what your perceptions are of what they are saying.


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