Loving More Than One

Polyamory as it relates to my life and written from my perspective only. MY thoughts, feelings and opinions.

Getting Used to Having Others Live With Us

on April 13, 2011

Dirk and I are having to get used to sharing our house again.

Our oldest and his wife (and their dog) moved in a few weeks ago. They had lived with her parents about 45 minutes away while they were out of work. She finally got a job there but it wasn’t long before he got one here. Now they live with us until they can get on their feet.

It’s taken some getting used to. We’ve lived along for at least 2 years now.

We are all using one bathroom since the other needs some repairs and we haven’t been able to do them for a couple of reason. Now we have to worry about when everyone needs the shower and timing for the hot water heater.

Our daughter-in-law is still working at her job in the other city and has to use my car to get back and forth. So, I schedule that and have to make arrangements to be picked up at work on the days she has the car.

Cooking. Dirk works shift work and, when he is on evenings as he is now, I’ve gotten used to not cooking and eating cereal, a sandwich, and just any easy thing. They want meals. Thankfully, they don’t mind cooking and they cook enough for us all. But they generally eat late. If she is working until 8pm that means it is 9pm before she gets home. One of us either has it cooked to coincide to her arrival or it has to be done after she gets home.

Dirk and I have two short hair dogs. No shedding. They have a solid white long (well at least longer) haired dog. It sheds. Those while hairs are everywhere. You’d think we had a cat in the house. I’m getting a bit tired of that I have to say. I bought them a desheding comb the other day. The dog doesn’t like it much but they used it some.

Laundry. We can’t plan on the washer and dryer being free now. It was my first eye opener. I went to go wash clothes for a trip I had to take for work and I found both the washer and dryer in use. Not so bad until you take into account that I had procrastinated on washing them and this was my last chance if I didn’t want to lose sleep doing it.

We don’t mind them living with us. It’s just an adjustment.

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2 responses to “Getting Used to Having Others Live With Us

  1. Sharon says:

    My brother and my parents are going through this right now. Now my parents have been “empty nesters” for 17 years when my brother moved back in with them. My parents had the same expectations as they did 17 years ago, but my brother was no longer in the habit of some of the courtesies that go along with living with family, like clearing visitors, informing them of his comings and goings, etc. So he wasn’t aware there was an issue until things blew up. Set aside a time on a regular basis to discuss issues, schedules and laundry :). Quick before they move out, get them to help make repairs to the house.

    • Wow, empty nesters for 17 years? That must really be an adjustment.
      They’ve left a few times and we didn’t know where they were going but they are adults.
      Truthfully, they’ve mostly been good. Trying to not get in our way. But, it’s just odd.
      I’ll try the laundry schedule. I have a calendar that I’ve asked them to put their work schedules on and they’ve been good about that. Just where they work changes it sometimes and that isn’t always conveyed as well as it should be.
      I remember moving back home after college and before I got married (went to college in a different state) and I was used to doing things my way. It took some adjusting to get back into the way my family did things.

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