Loving More Than One

Polyamory as it relates to my life and written from my perspective only. MY thoughts, feelings and opinions.

Starting On a Journey

on June 21, 2011

I was reading a blog that a woman has just started. They have opened up their marriage.

Oh the scariness and the excitement and the emotions of those first steps. I remember them well still. And I now know where things could have been handled better.

With my children, I want to save them from making some of the same mistakes I have made. You want to save them some pain in life. It just doesn’t work that way in general. Nor can it work that way when you are taking a ride in the backseat of someone’s new journey. It isn’t that I see big red flags. I just remember how the ride is full of ups and downs. I feel for them.

But, that’s part of the learning process. You learn best from things you do. Dirk and I wouldn’t be where we are without the bad as well as the good. The bad was very difficult to live through at times but it has paid off.

You have to admire someone for, figuring out what doesn’t work for them and instead of throwing the whole thing away right off the bat, looking for an alternative that does work for them.

No, non-monogamy isn’t for everyone. But the willingness to look outside the box in any fashion is admirable and potentially very rewarding.

Good Luck to the Pans.

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2 responses to “Starting On a Journey

  1. Jack says:

    I know this oh so well. My first experiment was a disaster….it’s amazing how much things chance simply by finding the right person to explore with. yes, it’s still scary, learning to trust and to be trusted, learning to communicate things you never dreamed you’d say before (How do you answer your girfriend when she asks “Did you score?” LOL). In the old days, I would have been terrified to answer, knowing that for some yet-unknown reason, a blowup was imminent; now her excitement and happiness at my happiness is hard to mistake. I was able to see her completely giddy this weekend as well (OK, hers was at least slightly more alcohol-assisted than mine), and it made me happy to see her so…so I feel comfortable taking her stated feelings at face value.

    • Jack, you and Eve have a good thing going. I like that you are now trusting in it and in her.

      Giddy? I suppose that is one way of describing her this weekend. Though even I thought it was a fun thing to watch.

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